comin apart
hands over my chest
palms pressin hard
fingers diggin in
like maybe
i can hold myself inside
but it’s movin
the heat
the noise
that thing under my ribs
scratchin to get out
I press harder
bone to bone
flesh to tremor
my hands aren’t enough
it keeps movin thru me
pushin against the cracks
it wants out
it wants to watch me burst
I can feel it crawlin
up my throat
behind my eyes
the pressure under my skin
where my pulse won’t quit
and I beg
stop
please stop
but it doesn’t listen
never does
I need weight
real weight
somethin heavier than me
than this suffocation
than this fuckin fear
need it to crush me
to pin me
to hold me together
but i’m leakin thru my fingers
drippin between my bones
and the more I press
the more I see
I’m not holdin myself in
i’m holdin myself down
fightin the pull
jaw tight
arms shakin
and god
I just wanna stop
let it take me under
and finally
be in the quiet
