Absence
As the flowers die,
I replace them with imitations.
Good fakes, that are impeccable
from a few feet away.
I spritzed them with perfume
from a small bottle that you overlooked
when you packed your things.
And at first, the room smelled
of new blooms, of hope.
But into the second week,
it reminded me of old women
and natty sweaters on a too warm day.
I try to not go through our pictures,
but I do. The red-light ones…
I want to masturbate to them,
to help with this loneliness.
I try; Fumbling with my feeble erection.
Failing, because there is no blood flow
after a broken heart.
Even if I could cum, it’d be dust.
I am only ancient these days.
It’s not the house that’s crumbling.
It’s me.
The walls still stand.
The windows still catch the light.
But inside,
there’s a collapse no one can see.
I move through rooms like a shadow
of someone I used to be.
I touch things,
to remind myself that I’m still here.
But nothing touches back.
Nothing smiles at my sighs.
There’s a silence, that doesn’t come
from the absence of sound.
It comes from the absence of you.
A silence that lives
in the space between heartbeats.
That void where your own
used to beat.
I try to fill it with noise.
With motion.
I wave away those shadows
that offer me embraces of cold.
But I crumble in the shroud of loneliness,
and it swallows me whole.
I miss you in ways I can’t explain.
Not just your voice, or your touch,
but the way you made me
feel like I wasn’t
just passing through life.
Now I’m in a room with no highlights.
Memories are gray shadows
teasing me.
I reach out, to the nothing.
I grasp by the handfuls, your absence.
~~~
That is just frikin brilliant….broken heart brilliant…..just plain bloody brilliant.
I hope the writing is cathartic for you.
Everything is impermanent…..stay calm and stay safe.
Well damn, thanks for that.
It is creative writing. My private life is awesome!
I tend to read others’ material, and it gives me ideas, visions, that help me create my own versions of what I read. Reading is a huge motivator to me. It’s fuel.
thank you for the awesome comment. I spent a lot of thought into this write (not my norm, I usually write in a blur).
This pulls at the heart and strings it till there is nothing left. Wow
Hey Fia!
Well good then, because I was looking to make it gutting. Success?!
I like wow’s. So thank you!
Extremely heartfelt poem only you could have written.
Mr Tim!
It is heartfelt. it has to be in order to get the angst involved. ALthough it is not reflective of my life currently. (Thankfully!). I wanted it to have some emotional pain.
Good to see ya, amigo.
Beautifully penned, Mark. Into the book it belongs! The longing in this write is felt my friend, really pulled at these old heartstrings. Amazing write. Appreciate you.
Damian
Hey Damian, how’s you?
It’s been a while since I was in here, so I needed some impact to pay my dues here.
This is what I picked.
Thank you. I had been reading some great writes prior, and it compelled me to come up with something aching. This is the result. I’m appreciative of you letting me know that it succeeds.
Hey Styxian,
I dropped my heart, had to pick it up so it wouldn’t be left on the ground floppin around like a fish fighting for water…
My God! So damn good.
So happy to see you posting! Please tell Adelphina I say hello🌺
It’s a doozy, I know. I meant it to be an ass kicker.
(I’m liking that current avatar of yours! You look great!)
Even if this isn’t an accurate portrayal of current events, it is relatable to many, if not all, a time or two. That’s what I was after.
I don’t want to be stuck in one certain type of “fluffy” writing. Lol.
Thanks btw. You keep kickin butt!
Awww, thanks.
It’s called “breaking free.”
No, it’s not reflective of your current life but what a write. The absence of a partner or loved one can really be felt when things get quiet. No laughter or anyone to take care of and vice versa. Life is meant to be shared. Loneliness sucks. But most of the time it’s only for a little while. People get on planes and stuff, you know, to visit. So hang in there buddy. I’m taking you to a rematch of miniature golf!!
This is relatable to the world, especially after Covid. We still are struggling to get back to how it was:)
Hey. you did pretty good at putt-putt! And you got to see some gators up close. Small ones anyway.
Its my turn to fly to you huh! We gonna putt-putt? Hmmm?
This write is a bit about how it is when we are apart, but I cope well. I just have to play up the drama!
Thanks for being you, and sharing the patience of distance with me.
Man , does this hit home.
I won’t name nameds to protect the innocent and the depraved but you lit it up Mark and I knocked them down with broken shot glasses and stains where they should be ….
BIG
RL AWARD if you will anyway …
Dude, this is not reflective of my current status. Me and Del are still living the dream, and trying to see each other as much as possible, considering the distance.
This write is simply me being creative with how I see life during some situations. I don’t want to be too sappy with joy joy stuff too much. LOL. So I switch it up.
I hope that it doesn’t hit too close to your home either!
Thank you, too. I’m still trying to bring my A game where ever I post. Its good to know that it pays off.
Dear M,
Copy the accolades of my esteemed poets above. Creative writing like this is rare because you are able to pull in your reader and make them believe the energy or lack thereof is real and so relatable. The ache of missing a loved one…You had me thinking I actually smelled perfume! As per, fab writing.
H🌷
Hello HHHHHHHH! LOL.
How’s things?
I’m just trying to come up with writes that can make people “see” and feel it. Yaknow?
Thank you, too, for being here!!!
And yeah, I get dragged back to make my first comment at you trying to pull one.
This was pretty brutal, and I was absolutely crazy about the way you paced it.
Glad to hear there was nothing wrong in your personal life. This was a kickass write.
As always.
once in awhile I can mimic the brutality of some of you better writers. It’s motivating actually. Your words are greatly missed young lady.
Thanks, you.