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![Profile picture of Fia Naturie]()
Fia Naturie posted in the group ”BACK TO POETRY BASICS”
Was born with eyes wide open
To be prepared for the truth
Not wanting to offend
What had happened on the roofHolding pasts in a box
We crawl, we stand, then walk
Rusty keys enter locks
Speaking words before caughtStreams of tears without sound
Lover’s end, rings withdrawn
heartbeat forever unbound
Dawn shows you were a p…Read More2 Comments-
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![Profile picture of Fia Naturie]()
Thank you
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![Profile picture of RPM]()
RPM wrote a new post
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Read MoreShe steps from the showera vision of warmth and water and light. Steam still clinging to her skin,drops tracing paths down her shoulders,the air itself seems to hush for her.That towel, drawn so tight to guard her beauty.Shapes that...
7 Comments-
![Profile picture of Sam Nash]()
They are usually the reason we ever learned what longing means.. and the reason we write about it… beautiful
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![Profile picture of RPM]()
Thank you p, Sam. Grateful for your comments.
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![Profile picture of Tim]()
This is so excellent. I’m really glad I read it, thanks for posting.
This particular stanza didn’t read smooth. If I may suggest…
That towel, is drawn tight
to guard her beauty.
His hands still remember
the soft curve shapes of her lovely breasts,
the gentle hollow where shadows meet.Great writing.
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![Profile picture of RPM]()
Thanks for reading, and for your thoughtful analysis,Tim. I appreciate your constructive criticism very much.
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![Profile picture of Tim]()
My pleasure. 🙂 Awesome poem.
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![Profile picture of Neville]()
Incredible ink .. and so perfectly spilled ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐👍
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![Profile picture of RPM]()
Thanks, Nev!
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![Profile picture of CasketSharpe]()
CasketSharpe wrote a new post
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Read More“The glass keeps us distant-yet so near, but so far On this Halloween night-I’m sitting in her car, “Red teeth stained as my jaws flexVampire sucking the foul blood from her discarded Kotex, “Watching...
4 Comments-
![Profile picture of Visions_of_Insanity]()
Delicious!
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![Profile picture of CasketSharpe]()
In its own Peeping Tom type of way.
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![Profile picture of I_IS_ ME]()
Dude, we promise you’re a wild man, great visuals with this one dude
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![Profile picture of CasketSharpe]()
I call it pull and release
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![Profile picture of Backdeckbenny (Peter)]()
Backdeckbenny (Peter) wrote a new post
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Read Morepart one:All addictions start with suffering.All addictions end with suffering.part two:Addiction beginswhere silence screams.Voids filled withthe cold retreat of alcohol,tobacco’s dry whisper,the sharp thrill of cocaine,gambling’s pulse,screens pulsing past midnight,the slow hunger for shopping,the aching need for moisture from...
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![Profile picture of Crimsin]()
hello dearest Benny my pain is just too great to live any other way I’ve really honestly tried more than once and I will never willingly put myself through that again… this is powerful if you have a better way to cope I am happy for you my friend ❤️
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![Profile picture of Backdeckbenny (Peter)]()
The root cause of all suffering is thinking.That’s where the answer lies.
I coped by reading as much as I could about depression, grief,the way our minds work and trick is.The best material,without sounding religious,was in Buddhism.
Happy to share some authors with you if you’re interested.
🙏🙏🙏🙏
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![Profile picture of Visions_of_Insanity]()
Intelligent poem here dude. Well said and well executed.
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![Profile picture of Thomas W. Case]()
Brilliant work.
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![Profile picture of CasketSharpe]()
CasketSharpe wrote a new post
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Read More“Many of the Army Rangers thought nervously ‘why me’As they implemented their training to control their anxiety, “They were specially chosen, because they did not have childrenUnderstanding the knowledge alone would instantly end them, “Legends say...
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![Profile picture of Fia Naturie]()
This is good gore. Definitely can see that in a Dark Comic. Not sure if that is what it’s called.
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![Profile picture of CasketSharpe]()
It is wicked.
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Okay, Fia 👌 Thanks for your submission and participation. You’ve made a very good start, with the basic format of a Sonnet down pat … 3 Quatrains and a Rhyming Couplet, and your rhyme-scheme is spot-on. In particular, your topic is interesting, with emotion depth, strong metaphorical imagery, and captivating ambiance that sets the mood. With a b…Read More