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twofiftythree posted in the group ”BACK TO POETRY BASICS”
bi-trillets attempt. this one wasn’t easy for me…never do well when rhymin is involved.
endless night confession
breathe in the black smoke, love feels like a joke
the nights we wasted tasted strange
cheap liquor kiss, dirty exchangeyou were my worst itch, struck like a kill switch
old barroom lungs in borrowed light
we swore we’…Read More-
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I wonder if we are readin the same poem. I really expected this one to get marked up with a red pen on all the places I went wrong. I appreciate your input and the lessons you’re providin. I’ll agree with you on fixin the rhyme so I’ll add the s to pain. but you’re gonna have to pry my lowercase letters and lack of punctuation from my cold dead ha…Read More
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Fia Naturie wrote a new post
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Bravo, Fia. You know how to tell a story my friend. This is really good, can’t wait to hear more. Take a bow!! Appreciate you, cuz.
Damian
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Never hearing your voice before, Fia 👀👂
I did not know what to expect, but I can’t say I’m disappointed in any way … actually, I was quite taken with how smoothly soft ‘n sultry, creamy ‘n smooth it is, as though my mind was being caressed through my ears on a warm, gentle breeze by a hundred dandelion flowers.
I heard no reason for the “Adult” sticker … YET, anyway. Now, at least, I’m prepared for any sweetly naughty surprise one might hope for!. ; p
Anyone ever tell you you’re a VERY talented lady?
YEP! That’s my outlook! ⁓ Richard🖌-
Thank you, Richard. I put the adult sticker because I figured I might as well start from the beginning. lol
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Sam Nash wrote a new post
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Damian DeadLove wrote a new post
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First this can be both a poem and a song, it has the beat of a song. Second, You said in your note that instead of thinking wiser You rolled with it, but truth to be said your poem from first line to the final is all wisdom. For me this is a monologue with the inner self to make sense of what is not sense, To be aware of everything that happened and what is needed to be changed, the “had enough” and welling to breaking the patten of the same repeation is felt in the final verse, your poems always has a personal feeling and that make them special.
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Thanks so much for reading and your kind words, Light. So glad you connected with the write my friend. I think it works either way myself. I must say I always enjoy your commentary and opinions, you’re pretty much on point with where I was going with this one. There are always pieces of me in my writes my friend. Appreciate you.
Damian
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Oh damn, that last verse hit hard. After each of the other verses, it became a hammer of defiance. I’m not sure I believe in a norm. It always just strikes me as others expecting you to be more like them. Meet them at their level because they’re too lazy to move. To evolve. No thank you. This is another strong piece. And I think just rolling with it worked out beautifully, my friend
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Thanks so much for reading and your kind words, Willow. So glad you connected with the write my friend. I don’t know that I believe in the norm either, I agree it’s like living up to the standard of others, funny thing is that they can’t live up to it themselves. But hypocrites love to snipe at others. So glad I rolled with it as well. Appreciate you.
Damian
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Damian when the illusions melt away and the masks are gone there is a great since of liberation as well as sadness. Not fitting in can make one feel alone but at the same time emancipated from a lifetime of being a square peg in a round hole. Truly great poetry here, my friend. You have given me the reader a glimpse into a life that is honest to oneself. I am most enriched to have read this.
John
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Fia Naturie posted in the group ”BACK TO POETRY BASICS”
Secret Ride (magic of Poetic Voice)
He came at night,
On a wind of heat.
A bead of sweat,
On lips so sweet.
“Come with me”
He whispered close.
They are all asleep,
Said, my sexy host.
I crawled out of bed.
On crumpled sheets.
A teddy that cling,
To my heat.
Just be quiet.
It will be fun.
No one will know,
Not even one.
Once ins…Read More-
Ahhh, Fia

I so love and enjoy the fun of how you’ve used your amazingly gifted poetic voice to blend the vibrant colors, hues, and textures of your deliciously delightful diction to paint word pictures into our joy-filled imaginations, in such ways it all comes to life.
Your short lines build a quick cadence, and with spot-on line-bnreaks, r…Read More
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A brilliant submittal, Syr Dru
Congratulations on another successfully excellent effort in displaying such admirable skill in the true essence and grasp of that which is conveyed in these earnestly shared teaching sessions.
Your poetic potential is second to none … this piece is spot-on in every sense of the phrase: meter, poetic voice, i…Read More