This reads as those thoughts whilst falling asleep, the tone somewhere between whisper and silence. We all pay the toll man in the end, but self awareness is the biggest coin in the purse. Delicate and beautiful write.

Beautifully word smithed thoughts. I especially liked

“A child rose and warned,
the air here bites.
So I lifted a mist of mercy,
and veiled myself
in its scent.”

Well done 🌼

Your insight and depth of vision here is deep and filled with contemplative beauty. Loved this so much I read it twice. I wanted, needed, to absorb this in my soul as I read. This is truly a work of poetic art that speaks deeply of dreams that await and those that are signs of what fate holds ahead. Truly a remarkable poem.

John

Brilliantly penned, Roma. Wow, simply amazing write my friend. Superb storytelling nicely illustrated by tight imagery. Excellent work. Appreciate you.

Damian

Thank you, Damian. Your words mean a great deal. I hoped the imagery would echo that hazy, in-between space where dreams and reflection meet. I’m so glad the story and atmosphere carried through.

This is one of the best things posted on this site. I’m sure you hear often enough that you are a really good writer, but understand that it is a fact. I’ve been on so many sites over the years and have developed a particular eye for what is truly good writing consistently. You do so.
Skill is second to having the inner eye for seeing writes play out in a visionary style. This does. There are thousands of wonderful poems out there. But they don’t pull the reader in deeply, immersed. But this one is why readers get hooked.
Outstanding write, Romaj.

Thank you so much, Styxian! I’m really honored this piece resonated with you. It came from a mix of dream imagery and reflection, so it’s wonderful to hear the vision pulled you in. Your kind words mean a lot and inspire me to keep exploring my writing.

Roma. Just wow, I wanted this to keep going!
It’s also very alluring to me.
It pulls you in and guides you through the entire read.

Spectacular write:)

It was a great vacation baby! And when I saw this title, I was expecting it to be more about that, and not about my Army years, etc.
I used to write little snippets of lines on whatever scrap paper I could find back then. It was my woo-sah thing. Nowadays we have computers and Ipads etc. My ol tablet was my go-to for years! It’s ancient and still works, like me. LOL

This is a beautiful gift, this write. I took it to heart, right beside where you reside already. You are incredible.
I know how lucky I am, to have found you. Or you snared me, whichever it was!!!
This is quite a write, babydoll. Dammit.

Well it’s all true. I wanted to post a pic but I couldn’t fit it and I was excited to post this!
I didn’t want to try and figure it out.
I was jotting things down at work after lunch. Came home and wrote this.
I’m lucky to have found you too. It’s a two way street here pal!
Okay. Time to go to bed! I’m fixing to call you goodnight!

I love you too!!

You had us at St Augustine, you couldn’t had read us at DUP and not know we have tons of family there. We read this seeing Seminoles, and Spanish cannon offering freedom to runaways. Tight

We went to go see the fountain of youth museum and they fired the cannon!
OMG Meme! It was awesome! Viva St. Augustine they shouted before they lit the cannon.
Had a great time and beautiful memories. You are so lucky to have family there. It’s beautiful.
That was my first visit. Hopefully with more to come.

Thanks for stopping by and leaving a comment!

Adelphina, I was expecting to read about a vacation to St. Augustine Florida but was so moved beyond words by the story that unfolded before my very eyes. Truly a treasure of a poem that I am most honored to read by you tonight. This is filled with everything great poetry is about. A gently scribed lovers passion of a poem.

John

Blimey A. This pulsed my heart a little bit faster. A great eulogy and metaphor to your love for each other.

Beautifully penned, Adel. An amazing poem about the love and memories you and Mark share. Excellent work. Appreciate you.

Damian

This is so empowering. We need to stop this.

Hi Curt. I know I left a review for this poem on WC, but the message is so important, I’m glad you shared it here too.

The imagery on this piece is haunting- The yellow scream is so vivid, almost synesthetic image that makes human atrocity feel terrifyingly alive.

The way sound, color, and darkness intertwine lingers long after reading.