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twofiftythree posted in the group ”BACK TO POETRY BASICS”
ok…not a fan of haikus apparently. they’re harder than I thought. wrote a whole bunch wrong and had to start again. then my favorite involved a pond. I saw SeaCat’s and thought damnit…let’s not both write ponds. ultimately I realized I’d rather write a thousand sonnets than a single haiku. but I definitely learned somethin.
clouds file past t…Read More
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Crimsin wrote a new post
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Hoi Chère C.,
If I may quote you:
in my slumberous state I cause chaosDon’t we all?
I embrace the thought in real life.
There’s nothing more tedious or boring than perfection.So:
in my slumberous state I cause chaos
Is the cherry on the cake.
Just my opinion.À lovely write!
Kind regards, Gus -
Fantastic spill, my friend! May Arawn hear your darksome call and be your lantern into Annwfn. Not just yet though, we need more of your beautiful melancholy. Excellent poem as always.
Clay
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There is NO SIN in being a woman, none. If there is SIN, it is brought about by the burdens placed on women in a male dominated, patriarchal system and society. It’s a strange evolutionary process that a biological difference (having babies) became the source of oppression.
While I applaud the artistic value of this poem, its sadness, its flow, and metaphor, I am also torn in that there should be no sacrifice made. Instead, there should be a head held high acceptance of the chaos, of celebrating joining the chaos made by all of us as human beings, and we are a chaotic bunch.
Crimsin, I hope I have not trampled all over your poem’s garden, it’s just that women are not evil or gods, just human. And certainly not for sacrifice.
Curt
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hello dearest Curt good afternoon I get what you’re saying but my sin is more memories and reflection on days passed things I have done and regret I try to reconile them in me but they stilll make sad they are coming more ofteh these days and I’m not doing well it seems my soul is aware that my time grows short… I deeply appreciate your beautiful comment ❤️
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Thomas W. Case wrote a new post
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That button is crazy cool, sometimes to abuse is to show attention or to neglect is to show attention. Tight one dude
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Brilliantly penned, Thomas. Excellent write my friend. One must master the secrets of the Love Button.. Appreciate you.
Damian
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Sappho (Elke) wrote a new post
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The perfect piece for our extra bright sister above! How you began each cinquain with “Tonight” is very momentous, with an unexpected surprise at the end. This made me smile an ol’ cheshire grin. Wonderful write!
Clay
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Beautifully penned, Elke. Excellent write my friend with great flow. The words dance to the beat. Appreciate you.
Damian
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I’d like to speak in defense of the Moon… 🤣
Sappho, I love how your dance around the bonfire leads to the fire of passion and that you take full credit for your desire!!! I think we humans have always loved howling at the moon and our desires for intimacy. May our howling and intimacy make the moon shine full and bright!!!!
Curt
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Neville wrote a new post
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You are not the only one who got enlightened like this, and the truth it’s not that we are not smart, or can be easily deceived, in fact we are more intelligent than this, it’s just that we don’t think in their ways, or/and that our hearts doesn’t feel like theirs, but we learn don’t we? These incidents teach us that life is not like us or our hearts, how we think or feel, there is goodness and there is badness.
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How extraordinarily write You always seem to me, to be .. Bless You dear Light💕 You make my grey days seem golden 😎🌻💛👍
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LOL!
Two ponds would be just fine, but I’m quite chuffed with this one, myself!
Now, that’s a splendid Haiku, 253.
Ditch “the” and replace it with something meaningful, like “gold moon” or some such and it’ll sparkle on the page