-
![Profile picture of twofiftythree]()
twofiftythree posted in the group ”BACK TO POETRY BASICS”
ok…not a fan of haikus apparently. they’re harder than I thought. wrote a whole bunch wrong and had to start again. then my favorite involved a pond. I saw SeaCat’s and thought damnit…let’s not both write ponds. ultimately I realized I’d rather write a thousand sonnets than a single haiku. but I definitely learned somethin.
clouds file past t…Read More
![Profile Photo]()
liked this
1 Comment -
![Profile picture of RICHARD "Rascal" JENKINS]()
RICHARD "Rascal" JENKINS posted in the group ”BACK TO POETRY BASICS”
~———————————•§•———————————~
SESSION THREE
Wednesday, November 5th, 2025
This session (by request) will be on the Japanese Haiku form.Haiku 俳句
(by Western rules)An unrhymed Japanese poetic form recording or expressing the essence of a moment, that at fist blush might appear to be quite simple, yet is far from it. Still, it is far l…Read More
-
![Profile picture of RICHARD "Rascal" JENKINS]()
RICHARD "Rascal" JENKINS posted in the group ”BACK TO POETRY BASICS”
Submittted by: Twofiftythree
SENT 23 HOURS, 20 MINUTES AGO
think I got it with this one…the world goes quiet when I think of you
as if the noise remembers to be kind
the pulse slows down the edges soften too
and somethin steadier begins to bindI’ve spent my life in motion hard and fast
chasin the fire never once the pea…Read More -
![Profile picture of Fia Naturie]()
Fia Naturie posted in the group ”BACK TO POETRY BASICS”
Was born with eyes wide open
To be prepared for the truth
Not wanting to offend
What had happened on the roofHolding pasts in a box
We crawl, we stand, then walk
Rusty keys enter locks
Speaking words before caughtStreams of tears without sound
Lover’s end, rings withdrawn
heartbeat forever unbound
Dawn shows you were a p…Read More2 Comments-
![Profile picture of RICHARD "Rascal" JENKINS]()
Okay, Fia 👌 Thanks for your submission and participation. You’ve made a very good start, with the basic format of a Sonnet down pat … 3 Quatrains and a Rhyming Couplet, and your rhyme-scheme is spot-on. In particular, your topic is interesting, with emotion depth, strong metaphorical imagery, and captivating ambiance that sets the mood. With a b…Read More
-
![Profile picture of Fia Naturie]()
Thank you
-
-
-
![Profile picture of RICHARD "Rascal" JENKINS]()
RICHARD "Rascal" JENKINS posted in the group ”BACK TO POETRY BASICS”
GOODNESS, TFT!
Now, THAT is a proper Sonnet … it’s obvious you’ve done your homework.
Your creativity sparks, emotion sings, and diction dances. And, I like your use of elision. Could use a bit’a punctuation.
See critique and edits below:I said I don’t do THIS. POems that behave (STRESS-STRESS / a count long)
that count their beats and…Read More![Profile Photo]()
liked this
3 Comments-
![Profile picture of RICHARD "Rascal" JENKINS]()
V3L4 should be: What’s next, a ballad? Maybe, one or two.
-
![Profile picture of twofiftythree]()
much appreciated. good luck convincin me to use punctuation 😉
-
![Profile picture of RICHARD "Rascal" JENKINS]()
Now, Syr Bard
Post it so everyone can enjoy your amazing flexibility and creativity with a poet’s pen.
I’ll be first in line to review it for you! ⁓ Richard
-
- Load More Posts
LOL!
Two ponds would be just fine, but I’m quite chuffed with this one, myself!
Now, that’s a splendid Haiku, 253.
Ditch “the” and replace it with something meaningful, like “gold moon” or some such and it’ll sparkle on the page