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Daniel Long wrote a new post
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Fia Naturie wrote a new post
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Powerfully penned, Fia. Into the book it belongs! Amazing write my friend, with dark vibes very present. Appreciate you.
Damian
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G’Mornin’, Fia 🌤️
Good title, and what a great lead-in with V1’s frustrating contradictions setting the mood for what’s to come (L2, make it “you’re” sad).
Boy howdy! You sure know how to express the angst so many of us have had to endure and overcome; yet, it seems some never do … sadly so.You’re such a creative writer, Ria: I admire your keen ability to weave vivid imagery and emotion throughout every verse and in the use of spot-on rhymes, timely line-breaks, and smooth flow.
Excellent wrap-up verse, too. For rhyme’s sake with “despair,” consider using “there” rather than “here” (just a thought).“Wake, wake from this despair! (great poe-esque touch)
It is me you’re talking to …
no one else is there.”Fia, you’re such a joy to read and share with. 🌈
Thank you ever-so warmly! ⁓ Richard🖌 -
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And there’s a dominance in your kiss…
Love that line. Good piece