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FlatDaddy wrote a new post
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Thank you, Fia. It was a trip performing this, especially at the end. The first time I did it the crowd just sat there, silent. I thought, oh, fuck! I guess I’ll never do this one again. Then someone started to clap, then another, then everyone was applauding — but not very loud. And I understood.But that was a hellofa time, very scary, especially for the people who had been infected. A sure death penalty, very slowly.
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I read this late last night and had to log off before I commented.
This is intense. For as dark as it is it has a lot of intimacy.
Through you the audience got to know her and in turn care about her.
Bravo!👏-
Thank you. I do appreciate the comment. I was in the middle of writing a message to you about “Pretty Eyes” when I got your notification.
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A bit macabre, here. Quite appropriate for this time of year. Poe might be jealous. Very good writing, I’d say.
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redzone wrote a new post
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This poem beautifully channels Neruda’s sensual spirit. The union of passion, earth, and language. The imagery feels both intimate and elemental, echoing the way Neruda made love and nature inseparable.
It’s a stirring tribute that captures his essence…beautifully penned.
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You turned the poem into something else with this, “and all the common words of my peasant’s pen.” Following the next verse, IF you didn’t brilliantly did this, it would have been just a strong sensual poem, but with how amazingly You brought a higher level with the last two line of verse one, then the gorgeous verse two, is what makes the poem very special to me, exploring and expressing a deeper connection. I believe Pablo would admire this🤍
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One of the things I love about Neruda’s poetry is his use of everyday words. With them, he word paints images, metaphors and a feeling of LIFE that exists and surrounds us with HOPE.
Light, thank you so much for your insight and understanding of what I wanted (no, needed) to express. If Neruda were still alive, I think I would be tempted to send this poem to him.
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Paula Jobi wrote a new post
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Damian DeadLove joined the group
”BACK TO POETRY BASICS”
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Willow wrote a new post
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Thought on this one Lady, maybe to much. We think it would had hit even harder if posted closer to Halloween
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Extraordinarily compelling ink ma’am .. I was hooked from the off and enjoyed the ride write to the very opposite end and no kidding .. Write on my fine literary friend .. Neville
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I’m not entirely convinced my muse will give me much time off. If you saw my unposted drafts…egads. Thank you for the support on this one
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Powerfully penned, Willow. Excellent write my friend with precise imagery and wordplay. Felt this one! Appreciate you.
Damian
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The way you combined nature and human in this piece is breathtaking. We should not be used as collateral damage for the error of polluting the air. That is one way I took this piece.
Then the ones that are cast aside unnoticed.. That is sad, but I believe that there is someone noticing them. They may not know what to do to bring more light in their black hole.
Just thoughts I got from your piece. -
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Wow. This is a cigarette and a shot write. It is almost bitter, almost defeatist. Yet it also feels like you’re scoffing at the processes too. You need a seashell necklace while writing like this. Reminding you of what’s salty out there.
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Well, I don’t smoke and I’m a tragic lightweight drinker. Just a full blood hippy who lives by the Moon. Still, I get your drift. I guess when I was writing this, I was reminding myself that my little whimpers are fairly insignificant in the grand scheme of things. Thank you for your thoughts, Styxian
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Willow…you had me from the first line and held me there until the last.
Message delivered and your mission accomplished.
The universe never pauses.Everything rises and ceases,nothing permanent….thank God.Imagine a permanent Trump. -
This is dark with a lot of reality in it too. You nailed it with your silent hammers.
What ever the subject matter your writing is it’s articulate and thought provoking. -
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I can see why there is silence and then applause. It is poetic the way she decided to leave this earth the moment she arrived, but still, that is something. I like sending it to the senator, showing what happens to people with budget cuts to needed medications and research for a cure.