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Jacob erin-cilbertoOffline

    • Profile picture of redzone

      redzone wrote a new post

      Neruda's Lips

      Neruda’s Lips   I have flayed your body with my tongue of fire, suckled your youthful breasts with lust and desire, eaten your musky whispers with the deadliest of sins, and all the common words of my peasant’s pen.   You are the poetry of my land, the dark earth...

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      11 Comments
      • This poem beautifully channels Neruda’s sensual spirit. The union of passion, earth, and language. The imagery feels both intimate and elemental, echoing the way Neruda made love and nature inseparable.

        It’s a stirring tribute that captures his essence…beautifully penned.

        • Neruda’s love sonnets are some of the best poetry ever written (IMHO). And yes, exactly, love and nature are inseparable, flowing in and around each other. Thank you, RomaJ for your lovely and muchly appreciated comment and visit. You are always welcome to walk through my poetry.

      • This has so much passion in this. I agree with Romaj beautifully penned.

      • Damn!
        Excellent! You had me at “flayed”. What a vivid, well placed word.

        • I love that word (flayed). It felt and sounded right to use it in this poem. Thanks for your observation and for the fine comment.

      • You turned the poem into something else with this, “and all the common words of my peasant’s pen.” Following the next verse, IF you didn’t brilliantly did this, it would have been just a strong sensual poem, but with how amazingly You brought a higher level with the last two line of verse one, then the gorgeous verse two, is what makes the poem very special to me, exploring and expressing a deeper connection. I believe Pablo would admire this🤍

        • One of the things I love about Neruda’s poetry is his use of everyday words. With them, he word paints images, metaphors and a feeling of LIFE that exists and surrounds us with HOPE.

          Light, thank you so much for your insight and understanding of what I wanted (no, needed) to express. If Neruda were still alive, I think I would be tempted to send this poem to him.

      • It was/is my pleasure to “whisper” and a big Thank You to the Roman Goddess, daughter of Cupid and Psyche. It’s not often I get a comment from royalty. Not sure I am worthy, but it is appreciated muchly.

      • You are most welcome my friend🌸 and consider your poem sent, his soul is still out there, just call Him 😊

      • Yes, please post it. I would love to read what, how you see Neruda’s love sonnets.

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      Paula Jobi wrote a new post

      BLUE BIRD

      BLUE BIRD Everyone stared at the prettybright blue bird on the power line.Pedestrians pointed and cars stopped.You could hear it's cheerful melody. It raised it's wings and walkedthree feet of the wire prepping fortakeoff. Suddenly, it burst into flames and hit...

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      Willow wrote a new post

      Sucker Punched

      the world has pausedsilence hammers at the sensesheart still beating...barely...does it even matter...it flutters unheard the universe is screamingbanshee howl of despairsucking life from hopea wildly spinning black holedevouring beauty in its path I am collateral damageinsignificant to the true lossa...

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      27 Comments
      • Poetic oxygen is hanging by a fingernail in our world. But! There is hope. Well done, Willow.

      • Thought on this one Lady, maybe to much. We think it would had hit even harder if posted closer to Halloween

        • To be honest, I hadn’t even thought of Halloween. 😂 Just nursing a bit of pain. I actually didn’t think on it much at all. This was a write and drop piece. I tend to do that when emotion is high. Thank you for your thoughts, ME

      • Extraordinarily compelling ink ma’am .. I was hooked from the off and enjoyed the ride write to the very opposite end and no kidding .. Write on my fine literary friend .. Neville

        • I’m not entirely convinced my muse will give me much time off. If you saw my unposted drafts…egads. Thank you for the support on this one

      • Powerfully penned, Willow. Excellent write my friend with precise imagery and wordplay. Felt this one! Appreciate you.

        Damian

        • I felt it too…like a baseball bat to the crotch. There were layers in this one. World and…life, if you get my drift. Thank you, my friend. Your continued support means a lot

      • The way you combined nature and human in this piece is breathtaking. We should not be used as collateral damage for the error of polluting the air. That is one way I took this piece.
        Then the ones that are cast aside unnoticed.. That is sad, but I believe that there is someone noticing them. They may not know what to do to bring more light in their black hole.
        Just thoughts I got from your piece.

        • You’re not far off the mark on this one. As I said to Damian,👆 there are layers to it. Where it takes the reader is between them and their imagination. Thank you for your thoughts, Fia. Much appreciated

      • the same as for all of us – some care
        thank you Willow

      • Wow. This is a cigarette and a shot write. It is almost bitter, almost defeatist. Yet it also feels like you’re scoffing at the processes too. You need a seashell necklace while writing like this. Reminding you of what’s salty out there.

        • Well, I don’t smoke and I’m a tragic lightweight drinker. Just a full blood hippy who lives by the Moon. Still, I get your drift. I guess when I was writing this, I was reminding myself that my little whimpers are fairly insignificant in the grand scheme of things. Thank you for your thoughts, Styxian

      • Willow…you had me from the first line and held me there until the last.
        Message delivered and your mission accomplished.
        The universe never pauses.Everything rises and ceases,nothing permanent….thank God.Imagine a permanent Trump.

        • A permanent Trump sounds like eternal hell. It’s bad enough dealing with it now. And we still have years ahead. I don’t even like the contemplate what will happen next. It’s like living in a minefield. Thank you for your thoughts, Peter

      • This is dark with a lot of reality in it too. You nailed it with your silent hammers.
        What ever the subject matter your writing is it’s articulate and thought provoking.

        • We can’t always hear the blow coming. We just find ourselves flat on our back in agony. Such is our world at present. Thank you for your thoughts, Adelphina

      • Brilliant use of languge and great imagery.

      • damn…incredible write.

      • The world is all too willing to leave the hurt ones behind. Great ink friend.

        • Truth and facts right there. We gotta pick each other up. Thank you, my friend

      • We see each other. We hear each other. We fall together. We rise together. Thank you for seeing, Volupta

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      RomaJ wrote a new post

      Plexiglass Train

      We travel through the dark--in a train made of glass--a clear shell gliding througha ruined world.Outside, the city sleeps in shadow--sealed off from its own contagion.Now it’s a tourist route--a safe way to witness decay.The ticket promised:You may look,...

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      14 Comments
      • This is like a dystopian future. Great ending. 🙂

        • Thank you! I’m glad the ending stood out. It’s dystopian, yes. but really about how the privileged can buy a ticket to witness poverty from behind glass, without ever having to touch it.

      • Hoi hoi
        What a write!
        And the longer I read, the thinner the glass will become.
        Can you see who is giving the thumb up?
        I’ve tried, but I can’t give you more than one!

        unsure which side of the glass
        I belong to
        The cherry on the cake!
        Keep them coming please.

        Kind regards, Gus

        • Thank you so much! I love how you caught that image of the glass thinning. The barrier was never meant to hold for long. And your line about the thumbs up made me smile! I really appreciate your kind words and encouragement.

      • We humans are complex and complicated at the same time. Is there glass or any kind of barrier that separates our complexity?? I’m not sure there is. I think the complication comes in when we do not understand these complexities, understand that we are capable of anything and everything. That we humans, because we learn and are conscious, can change the world and ourselves, become neither beauty nor monster, just human(e). These are the thoughts I had as I read your poem RomaJ. I liked how the glass disappears and leave you wondering, “who am I” and perhaps also “who do I want to be”.

        Amazing writing RomaJ.
        -Curt

        • Thank you so much, Curt. I really appreciate the depth of your reflection. You’re absolutely right. Our complexities can both connect and divide us, and maybe the glass isn’t a barrier at all but a mirror of our own awareness.

          I love how you phrased that. Becoming neither beauty nor monster, just human(e). That’s exactly the kind of questioning I hoped the poem would evoke.

      • Powerfully penned, Roma. Excellent wordplay and the imagery made me feel like a passenger. Outstanding work. Appreciate you.

        Damian

        • Thank you so much, Damian. I’m really glad the imagery pulled you in and made you feel like a passenger. I appreciate your kind words.

      • What a great idea to write about. Some writers “see”. You do. The way you led the reader along the corridor of scrutiny(?)
        and put them almost as a prisoner forced to watch it play out. Transfixed.
        Great write and thoroughly thought provoking.

        • Thank you so much, Styxian. I’m really glad the poem resonated with you, and I appreciate your generous words about the writing. I love that you described feeling “transfixed” –that sense of uneasy observation was exactly what I hoped to evoke.

          The idea for Plexiglass Train came from thinking about the screens and devices we all look through every day– we’re all passengers in our own glass compartments, watching the world and each other through layers of reflection.

          And sometimes, as we gaze through our own glass screens, we almost catch a glimpse of our own reflection.

      • There is something of magic realism inherent in your verses. A dripping ambiguity & multi-layered which leaves the reader curious. Glass is such a useful metaphor and you give full justice to the word.

        • Thank you so much, Ghosteen. I really appreciate your thoughtful reading. I’m glad the layers and ambiguity came through–glass felt like the perfect metaphor for that fragile line between what we see and what we sense beneath it.

      • This in a way reminds me of a traveling circus. How we go see the bearded woman or the unusually tall man.
        Different walks of life being set out to the public to entertain each night. They’re not monsters but maybe spectacles – and still we the public go seek them out because we are drawn to the unusual. Then we go home and they leave to a different town.

        Maybe a few stay tired of the circus life and maybe a few decide to join the circus looking for something unusual.
        How we are all interchangeable depending on the view.

        Sorry if I’m rambling!
        I loved the write:)

      • The imagery and story telling here are done to perfection. The passengers view the abject poverty outside from their comfortable train. Perhaps to them it just looks like more tv. Like seeing the hungry people of the world on their tv without ever having to interact or see them in person. But maybe the glass grows thinner when the reality brings stronger emotions even empathy. Truly a great poem you have penned here. You have mastered your craft. And I read in awe of your gift. I too had such an experience on a train long ago. I was on the Crescent City train headed from New Orleans to Boston. As we passed through the shacks in the slums of Birmingham, Alabama I heard a two man talking and one said, “You know America really is a dilapidated country” or something like that. It was an eye opener for me.

        John

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