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Tim wrote a new post
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I did it in high school one day with a friend. We kicked a can in the front of the school in pouring rain and kids were watching from the windows. He’s since passed away so I’ll always remember that day being glad we did it. 🙂
And yeah, us kids also ran in yards in the rain leaving our parents aghast. lol
Thank you for the comment, Adelly. 🙂
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Beautifully penned, Tim. Excellent write with a nostalgic flavor my friend. Nicely done. Appreciate you.
Damian
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Fia Naturie posted in the group ”BACK TO POETRY BASICS”
Was born with eyes wide open
To be prepared for the truth
Not wanting to offend
What had happened on the roofHolding pasts in a box
We crawl, we stand, then walk
Rusty keys enter locks
Speaking words before caughtStreams of tears without sound
Lover’s end, rings withdrawn
heartbeat forever unbound
Dawn shows you were a p…Read More2 Comments-
Okay, Fia 👌 Thanks for your submission and participation. You’ve made a very good start, with the basic format of a Sonnet down pat … 3 Quatrains and a Rhyming Couplet, and your rhyme-scheme is spot-on. In particular, your topic is interesting, with emotion depth, strong metaphorical imagery, and captivating ambiance that sets the mood. With a b…Read More
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Crimsin wrote a new post
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Beautifully penned, Brenda. Excellent write my friend, really dig this one a lot. Appreciate you.
Damian
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Lovely piece Brenda. The words are marvelously woven to create a delicate, fragile piece of poetry. xo
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I wonder if that spider, doing what nature intended, ever said to himself – what a lovely day it is today?
Nice poem, crimsin. -
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RPM wrote a new post
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They are usually the reason we ever learned what longing means.. and the reason we write about it… beautiful
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This is so excellent. I’m really glad I read it, thanks for posting.
This particular stanza didn’t read smooth. If I may suggest…
That towel, is drawn tight
to guard her beauty.
His hands still remember
the soft curve shapes of her lovely breasts,
the gentle hollow where shadows meet.Great writing.
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Thanks for reading, and for your thoughtful analysis,Tim. I appreciate your constructive criticism very much.
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Crimsin wrote a new post
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Oh! This reminds me of when me and my brother would play in the rain when we were kids.
In the front yard we didn’t have stickers so we would be barefoot. Lol
Good times!