Not sure how to edit a submission, but somehow, in internet madness, the pen ultimatum stanza was omitted. As if anyone gives a fuck!

submarines tightly knotted in our gulf

diving for my very existence

when I should have been diving for pearls

This sounds like the pain he felt was caused by her not caring. You cared more so you wrote about it. Nicly penned.

It’s good to read your material again. Some writers whack me upside the head with their weighty words. And I don’t mind a bit. It makes me think. It makes me curious. That’s the best drug to me: Curiosity. So thank you for feeding us this drug of yours.

Thank you Fia. In a nutshell, your interpretation is correct

Cheers Mark. I miss ‘chatting’ to the likes of Gary and your good self. For some reason (prob my IT incompetence) I can’t expand my messages on here. I’ll send my email.

so sorry to read this resonates. beyond cyber madness I send the greatest hug. oo, you get to smell my latest aftershave too. sauvage. lol

hello lovely Fia good evening you are an excellent story teller this is sexy and fun while being thrilling too 💕

Brilliantly penned, Fia. Amazing write, you’re a fantastic storyteller my friend. Dig this, cuz. Appreciate you.

Damian

very nice. lookin forward to next part.

Talk about a steamy build up the suspense here if just strong as can be. And the dialogue flows perfectly like a bunch of ladies on a night out at the bar. And then the guys lining up with drinks for the protagnist is a surpising and original plot line. Fantastic opening.

John

Crimson …nothing is permanent ever.Not joy,not sorrow but despair makes it seem like it will.

Shadows crawl beneath the skin,
where even light cannot seep in.
Hope decays in midnight air
and then despair ignores your prayer.

Take care🙏

In the burn I wither. That is something. Nicely penned, crimsin

I guess we all have our interpretations. I see a line of young people heading into a club or hanging out outside it to hear hip hop or rap. Many may disagree, but I see that kind of music as negative and detrimental. Just my two cents.

Tremendous flow here, my friend.

hello dearest Damian either they don’t read the situations or they are goading up to reveal what we know… through manipulation of a situation…they get me all the time this is one of your best in my opinion 💕

Thanks so much for reading and your kind words, Mary. So glad you connected with the write my friend. I loved those lines as well, you’re right there is no such thing as a safe place in the world’s current state. Happy to read your commentary again, hope your music projects are going well. Appreciate you.

Damian

“While destruction lies around the bend”

It’s interesting how the word lies changes the entire tone when read as one definition over the other. This is such a cleverly written piece. And powerful, as you excel at, my friend

Fanfuckingtastic Damian. Powerful and packs a tremendous punch!

I kinda get an image of friends drifting apart maybe due to political differences.

Great ink, friend