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Benjamin Scraps joined the group
”BACK TO POETRY BASICS”
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redzone wrote a new post
11 Comments-
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You turned the poem into something else with this, “and all the common words of my peasant’s pen.” Following the next verse, IF you didn’t brilliantly did this, it would have been just a strong sensual poem, but with how amazingly You brought a higher level with the last two line of verse one, then the gorgeous verse two, is what makes the poem very special to me, exploring and expressing a deeper connection. I believe Pablo would admire this🤍
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One of the things I love about Neruda’s poetry is his use of everyday words. With them, he word paints images, metaphors and a feeling of LIFE that exists and surrounds us with HOPE.
Light, thank you so much for your insight and understanding of what I wanted (no, needed) to express. If Neruda were still alive, I think I would be tempted to send this poem to him.
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Neville wrote a new post
10 Comments-
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Passionately penned, Neville. Amazing imagery and dig your wordplay my friend. Appreciate you.
Damian
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Sometimes brevity is just as strong, like a passing kiss. Your short poem here is very strong in its imagery and how it effects the reader.
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Lust at its Best! a very alluring and strongly passionate picture you’ve worded here. You know how to write in few yet powetful lines, the last two lines brought the unquenched desire, the helplessness, the sigh that comes with the complete surrender… Love this❤️
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redzone wrote a new post
4 Comments-
What a raw and intense tribute to Africa!
I’ve never been but you put into words and song a powerful truth.
How do we aim to live with it. Just wow-
Hi Adelphina, thanks for your visit. I wrote this during a time when my poems had more of an ‘edge’ to them. I wanted my poetry to be part of and reflect a culture of resistance, that was not agitprop but still drove straight to the heart of the reader. To tell the truth about the world but not preach at people. This poem began that journey. I liked this poem and so workshopped it with a writers group at the University of Iowa, and then I submitted it to some literary magazines, but none of them printed it. Oh well.
Adelphina, thank you for your comment; it is truly appreciated.
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This poem is powerful. Both a song of mourning and a call to remembrance. I love how the repetition and rhythm make “Africa” itself feel like a heartbeat pulsing through each stanza.
The imagery is rich with longing and pride, and the movement from loss to reclamation is deeply moving. It feels like a spiritual homecoming through language itself.
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This poem beautifully channels Neruda’s sensual spirit. The union of passion, earth, and language. The imagery feels both intimate and elemental, echoing the way Neruda made love and nature inseparable.
It’s a stirring tribute that captures his essence…beautifully penned.