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![Profile picture of Daniel Long]()
Daniel Long wrote a new post
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Read MoreThat pulsating moonglow within! The lantern of my soul, barely illuminating a strange, dark world. The supernovas within my eyes ignite the veil of psychosis, torching all the delusions. Revealing reality, the light within the dark, the obscurity of the twilight.
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![Profile picture of Styxian]()
Thanks Crims. I’m not much into doing rhyme, but it’s a good practice for staying mentally sharp with creativity.
Love is a type of energy, and they say that energy never fades. It just gets resourced. It’s around us all. We just have to be receptive for it.
Yeah?-
![Profile picture of Crimsin]()
yes of course admittedly it’s something I stuggle with I liked the rhythm of this piece it added to it something I feel…we are on similar wavelengths, I feel tonight I hope this piece is fiction or past tense 💕
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![Profile picture of Styxian]()
I’m a creative writer my dear. Just as some people write of horror yet it is purely fictional, I too write whatever is interesting me at the moment.
I just got back from seeing Del for a few days. Obviously life is good!
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![Profile picture of Benjamin Scraps]()
Evocative lines of syllabic longing. Just a relatable feeling
“Like a book reread, yet a page unturned
Like a match unlit, but feeling burned.”&
“How it all falls, with a sun unrisen
How dark the day, you didn’t listen.”I feel like these lines tie the theme together well.
Like Crim, I’m always trying to still the grinding in my brain and it’s a challenge for some of us…so many missed opportunities at genuine connection lost on being somewhat crazy lol. It seems that ‘longing’ has become a guilty pleasure for me lately haha. Yes, just shut up and listen to the wind….
Always great to see a DUP veteran poet posting something new…great choice of rhyme and slant rhyme….kinda takes me home again, if only momentarily…all those moments I didn’t listen, and I always appreciate a good use of anaphora.
Thank you!
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![Profile picture of Styxian]()
And you made me look up the meaning of a word…anaphora. So I learned something today! Thank you! I’m always curious and anxious to learn.
I used to do rhymers frequently. But as I evolved as a writer, I got away from it. It isn’t so easy! LOL
I can’t be in here as much as I’d like, time isn’t always cooperative. Yet when I do, I try to make it worth the reader’s time. And likewise, I search for inspiring pieces to read. It’s a good trade. Thank you for the encouragement!
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![Profile picture of Willow]()
I swear to everything solid, I have been here. But you painted both the lonely who faded & went away & the left behind. That was an incredible image. Those left behind don’t always care though. Mine didn’t. But many do & this is a gentle reminder to listen & take nothing for granted…least of all love
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![Profile picture of Styxian]()
Hello Willow!
I think we all have taken a few things for granted over our years. Perhaps especially a relationship. People tend to get too content or what-not. The “What could I have done better?” is an affliction that all too many have been cursed with a time or two. Or, their partner was the culprit. At any rate, I was wanting a solid voice to speak this out for me. Hopefully I succeeded!
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![Profile picture of Tim]()
I can relate Styx. Even your rhyming skills are polished. Great poem.
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![Profile picture of Styxian]()
Rhyming so consistantly and carrying the “n” ending so much was a task! LOL I won’t do many rhyming ones. But I thank you for the props on my attempt. And although AI makes it much easier to do, it matters to me that I did it solely with my own ability, or lack of! 😉
thanks Tim. I truly appreciate it.
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![Profile picture of Average Joe]()
I truly appreciate the,artistry of your cadenced flow. A fitting requirement for the death of love. Well done, well done.
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![Profile picture of Styxian]()
Whew! This one was work! LOL. And maintaining a sense of meter was obviously part of the task.
Thanks so much for that comment. I’m trying!
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![Profile picture of Damian DeadLove]()
Beautifully penned, Mark. Love the imagery my friend, amazing rhymes, excellent write. My favorite lines:
“How it all falls, with a sun unrisen
How dark the day, you didn’t listen.”
Appreciate you.Damian
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![Profile picture of Styxian]()
I’d gone back and forth on it awhile, but I really feel that it is good enough as a stand alone, compared to most of my writes.
I have a handful of rhymers, but it isn’t my norm, I know.
I’m all about free verse nowadays, obviously!
Thank you Damian. And I appreciate you my friend.
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![Profile picture of Ghosteen]()
I’m not adverse to rhyme as it can accentuate the emotions expressed. You work this well.
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![Profile picture of Styxian]()
Hey, we gotta mix it up sometimes. Dark, light, free form, structured, etc. It’s how we stay sharp minded!
I will take any form of critique, too. It’s how I know what hits and what misses. Yeah?
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![Profile picture of Adelphina]()
Oh Lordy. How to comment on this!! I got teary eyed while reading. It hits home on a personal note as I’m sure you know.
It is a beautiful write. I feel like I can touch it, it’s so real. This is perfect. Just like you:) -
![Profile picture of Styxian]()
But honey, you’re biased! LOL.
I rarely do rhymes. But, yeah, we gotta stay sharp right?
Smooch! -
![Profile picture of RomaJ]()
This poem aches with quiet truth–and is so beautifully written. The way love doesn’t end in an instant, but fades through silence and small distances. The repetition of “gone is” feels like the echo of a heart breaking, and the candle’s hiss at the end is such a perfect image of love’s final breath. Haunting, tender, and deeply human.
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![Profile picture of Styxian]()
Thank you, Romaj. The “gone is” part was work! carrying that “n” end rhyme through that many sentences was a chore.
But at the time I was challenging myself to come up with a strong rhyming one. It’s not my norm, but hey, we have to be well rounded I think. Thank you again!
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![Profile picture of Daniel Long]()
Daniel Long wrote a new post
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Read MoreDays later. I had written so little between Raven’s suicide and the days following. During the daytime, I would sit quietly in front of my laptop staring at a blank screen. Then I would naturally become frustrated and restless,...
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![Profile picture of Daniel Long]()
Daniel Long and
Angels are now friends
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![Profile picture of Daniel Long]()
Daniel Long wrote a new post
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Read MoreTo outgrow any weakness, we have to first feel the pain and the embarrassment it brings. We remember how it feels and we replay those awful images and we learn to coexist with nightmares.
3 Comments-
![Profile picture of Fia Naturie]()
Interestingly, being weak on something doesn’t mean you’re not strong. It is just for that one thing that we have to learn from.
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![Profile picture of Green]()
There’s definitely a lot of truth in this, but also everything in moderation. Becoming fixated on things won’t make you better, just neurotic.
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![Profile picture of Backdeckbenny (Peter)]()
Nice writing Daniel.
Thinking is the root cause of all our suffering…. we can’t stop thinking but we can stop long enough to watch the mind.
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hello dearest Styxian this really hit home I have trouble listening and have let love slip away because I didn’t love myself enough to fully open up here is the pain of it…this is so very sad and longing but beautifully executed 💕