This had me moving. The riff is good, and the music went well with it.

Powerfully penned, Drieks. You’re an incredible lyricist my friend. Your arrangements always fit your words tightly. Excellent work.. Appreciate you.

Damian

Oh Lordy! You’ve done it again.
It’s like you know what melody/hook to use depending on the tone of the lyrics.
Where to emphasize your message. I listened to this when you posted but didn’t know how to reply.
I was at a loss of words! That is rare! Hahaha
Much respect chica!
Keep killing it!

Thank you! ❤️

You’re a beast at this thing Lady, to freaking Tight

This i awesome. I somehow talked Fia into getting a Spoken Word group going (actually, I kind of bamboozled her into it). HER wants to join and she suggested we get Willow and you as well. After listening to this, I feel really out of my league. I’m a lifelong entertainer, but mostly in theater. When I started writing for performance, I had no music, just me, so that’s what I’ve been doing. But you would bring some real class to the group, and if we do this right, we can build something outstanding for all of us. Interested?

Hey, what happened to the audio? I sent a link to this page to a friend and he told me no song was here, so I came back — and it’s gone! Please put it back.

Ooohhh. This is good!
Loved take me in the dark so I can see the light
Enjoyed the snapshot lines.

Passionately penned, Fia. This write was fire my friend. Appreciate you, cuz.

Damian

I feel that this is a calling out that we al can relate to, and be enthralled by. it’s an all consuming request that is determined and also inviting too. Like “give me that and I’ll give you this” type of trade. We write with emotions, so perhaps we look for emotions in return. Yeah?
Cool write, Fia.

Fia, I could feel the entreaty of the woman as she beseeched her lover to give her words. I do agree the right words can make for a magical night in our out of bed. This poem speaks to me in a way that I could feel. Very well done.

John

Oh yes! Tell me more…more…more!

“useful idiots prefer brutality” killer fuckin line. excellent write.

So relatable… nicely done

Thanks so much for reading and your kind words, Mary. So glad you connected with the write my friend. I want music for this one. Currently I’m working on a song called, “Novocain.” The words are posted here on the site. I got the music laid out, got the growls recorded, trying to get a good vocal take on the verses and bridge. Which requires me to sing. lol. Glad to see you back! Appreciate you.

Damian

Brilliantly written socially critical text, dear Damien! You will definitely make a killer song out of it!

This is by far one of your best poems, Damian. Every stanza kicks ass. I like the Lennon reference and where you went with it. Great one!

Well this is strong! Like flexing on a page. It’s tight with its rhymes and meter, like a pro boxer hitting us with a thesaurus!
(damn, that’s a clever description, huh! LOL)
Powerful write, Damian. Golden gloves…

Thanks, Mary. Appreciate you.

Damian

Some people have no soul. The sad part is they thrive in their own filth. Great ink friend.

Enjoyed this poem immensely. From the rhymes, to the flow to the powerful message. Outstanding job Damian.

Thoroughly enjoyed from end to end .. No kiddin, write on brother .. Neville 😎👍

Fantastic work.

This is strong as straight vodka on the morning after the Bolshevik revolution in Russia. Very strong my friend. Truly a power tonic in this age of authoritarianism in America. You hit the bullseye. You are a master at writing song lyrics that rock my soul.

John

You know, there are times I wish you weren’t so nail on the head accurate. But these are dark days we’re entered into. Best to look them square in the eye. Brilliantly penned, my friend. Into the list it goes, as you say!

It seems that we need them both to see each other’s point of view.

Thanks for your considered comment.
I only put the political line in to highlight the point that one exists because of the other.
My politics are on the left because that’s where I see less selfishness but in truth there is only a bees dick between most political parties.
Business runs the show.

And on a whim.
I think I like you 😜

Oh. Daggers to the heart babe!
This write is terminal and has a quiet elegance about it.
The whole piece gets you in the feels.
It all tied together perfectly with the moth. I didn’t realize the significance of it until the end.
Just bravo! It needs to go in your book!

Proud fiancé right here!

I was talking to a co-worker the other day, about if we should tell our loved ones or not if we are “terminal”. Because it changes the dynamics of the relationship right away. Happiness is hard to have then. It’s always bittersweet from then on.
So, I began this write based on the dilemma. But then the whole moth aspect gave me a different approach, like a focal point away from the gloom.
I will undoubtedly hack at this some more, slightly, but for now this is what I got.
Thank you honey! It’s a bit heavy I know. Just a write I swear! 😉

This is a wonderful sad and bittersweed writing on a difficult and heavy topic, dear Styxian! The moth as a spirit guide is a well chosen and meaningful symbol. A moth knows how to die. It focuses only on the light and its overwhelming attraction towards it. I think death can show us what really matters in life. Gratitude for everything we have experienced in life, for the people we love and for all of life here on Earth. Of course, a terminal disease comes with many burdens and hardships but it also gives you the chance to say goodbye and to surrender completely to love – just like a moth does.

Jeez Mark, this is beautifully heart breaking and offers much food for thought. The moth motif is a clever touch.

Brilliant work.

Yes the big “C” through neighbors and family we are familiar with this destroyer of home, family, and bank accounts. We remember while younger a neighbor was sent back home to die with stomach cancer. Dude you would not believe the screams, the entire neighborhood felt relief with his passing. Maybe, just maybe this moth was also is spirit guide. To tight dude

Brilliantly penned, Mark. This one has layers and depth my friend, and it pulled on the heartstrings as well. Excellent write. Appreciate you.

Damian

I enjoyed this. It is full of images and captures the rolling duality of life and death, with style.
Regards James