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counted as nothing
- July 23, 2026

honestly I prefer fangs to smiles
- July 23, 2026
Location
California


I can seriously feel the tension in this piece, Daniel. You’re building this beautifully. My recommendations are to look at other options for the word, ‘snow’. It becomes redundant. Also, Chloe might refer to the men in the shadows as ‘bad boys’, but Gwen and the narrator may want a more specific term – something more specific or sophisticated and relevant to the circumstances.
Your writing is compelling