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Christine Shaw (Chris)Offline

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      Aldo Kraas wrote a new post

      Je crois en toi

      je crois en toiThat you FatherWill end the WinterIn six more weeksBecause I am already gettingTired of the WinterWe had 15- 20 centimeters of snowAnd also it is hard for me to walkOn the sidewalkBecause it hasn't been shovel...

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      Aldo Kraas wrote a new post

      Baby don't leave me

      Baby don't leaveMe for somebody elseBecause I want you to be mineFor the rest of my lifeI want you to be happy with meBecause I could never liveWithout youI want you to be a part ofMy every day lifeAlso...

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      Thomas W. Case wrote a new post

      Porch Cat Gospel

      She begged for it, pleaded,like everything alive does.Scratch at the door,singing her little sermon,tail ticking time.Green eyes flashing,centuries of instinct.So I put her out.Mesh cage on the porch.Sunlight thin.World almost safe.I left her there,like every other sunshine promise day.Groceries....

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      Curly Grace wrote a new post

      Poisonous Lullabies

      I only know of lullabiesaddressed to my soul, drip beautifully downfrom your perfect lips, washing away my fears. If you only knew all thethings you said to mewere poisoning my mind. Sure not of the truth anymore,too many feelings colliding,swirling around my head. I...

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      FlatDaddy wrote a new post

      Terpsickore: An Experiment in Rhyme

      Terpsickore:An Experiment in RhymeBy FlatDaddyShe’s not the girl he wanted,    she who haunted him and stalked    him and talked him into dance.Their romance, sparked by music,    He, too sick to see danger.    This dark stranger...

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      2 Comments
      • An excellently rendered work, Syr! 🎖️

        Well struck in grammar, vivid imagery and emotional timbre, metaphoric fancies, and all around palpable appeal … left me with an eerie sensation, which I suspect, is part of your intent.
        The rhyme scheme is both entertaining, original, and would be creatively challenging to the average poet, I think. The seven-count lines in Quadra-Verse are also quite unique, as it’s rare (if ever) I’ve read this exact format.
        The endline/three-syllables-in rhyme scheme flows nicely, too … I like it very much and may give it a go!
        NitPick: Check the four syllables in on V6-L, the only rhyme that tripped me.

        Thank you, Syr Poet, most humbly and gratefully for the gracious invite! ⁓ Richard🖌

      • Well, that’s a damned nice deconstructive review, Richard, but I confess I’m at a loss as to your V6-L problem; I fail to see it. As I said earlier, I have absolutely no formal training. Never took a class in poetry; highschool English Lit was the closest I got to that. Everything else is self taught. I didn’t start writing til I was in my twenties, and that was all performance work, more geared to my dramatic training. I never thought about writing poetry on a serious level until about 2o years ago; took a 20 year hiatus from life in general when I was injured. Didn’t write so much as a dirty limerick during that time, and finally wanted to see what I could do on a serious level about ten years ago, and even then my concentration was on entertainment. Stuff like, Omniumgatherum, to stretch my head and entertain. So, can you explain in more non-technical terms? I would appreciate it greatly.

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