Ghostly Hallucinations

Turning black all around me,
the air had icy fingers
pinching my skin with emotional frostbite.

A shrill cry followed,
echoing in the fog
of schizophrenia’s uncertainty.

Wandering through this graveyard,
the gravestones of my past
stand silently and somewhere within.

The eyes of a ghost follow me –
laughter, hideous laughter lurks in its eyes,
then I shiver with humiliation.

With hell in my mind,
my hair stands on end,
my eyes the windows to this furnace.

Normality,
was there for me,
then it was gone.

That air with icy fingers
claws at my face in the dead of summer,
horrid emotional pain follows.

With these scars of the past,
I am bleary-eyed,
I am fortunate.

Reality flickers.
I can sense it coming,
but I cannot recognize it.

Memories, these ghosts of my past,
come to me in hallucinations –
yet memories are lifeless!

Never recognizing a ghost
until my diagnosis,
I became perceptive of myself.

I scream in the icy blackness that is my mind,
where ghostly flickers of memories
project behind my eyelids.

Realizing,
no can hear me,
all the lushness of life deserted.

What happened to me?
I remember my heaven,
now I am in hell.

Many occasions,
people were statues
staring at me.

They were just as lifeless
and frozen in time as I.
These grey, foreboding,

and embarrassing moments
I have shared with many strangers
have left emotional scars.