-
-
Daniel Long wrote a new post
2 Comments -
-
Average Joe wrote a new post
3 Comments -
ReggiePoet and
RPM are now friends
- Load More Posts
My Friends
Thor_Azine
@thorazine
Al Ashcott
@al-ashcott
D. Ignatov
@ignatov
Adelphina
@adelphina
Styxian
@styxian
Groups
Unsung Underground
Private Group




I can seriously feel the tension in this piece, Daniel. You’re building this beautifully. My recommendations are to look at other options for the word, ‘snow’. It becomes redundant. Also, Chloe might refer to the men in the shadows as ‘bad boys’, but Gwen and the narrator may want a more specific term – something more specific or sophisticated and relevant to the circumstances.
Your writing is compelling