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Daniel Long wrote a new post
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Read MoreJust speak to meand you’ll gaze into thewilderness behind my eyes.This wilderness,lush in dreams,barren realities!As I open the gate for you,I sit and listen white-knuckledto the voices within my mind.The further you trek in my mind,the closer to summery...
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Nice slide rhyme and repetition…
Solid imagery in [pioneer’s compass]…
I had a new idea for implementation
of imagery…Do something like a Carlos Williams
Red Barrel…Like just insert in…
In a unique and strange way…
Or do such a thing at multiple
sites in the poem…Perhaps with multiple separate
images…
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Daniel Long wrote a new post
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Read MoreHeaven can wait…Death a distant thunderstormwith lightning strikes far offannouncing its distant presence.Suicide is not the answer.I do not want to hurtthose that show compassion.So, I’ve decided Heaven can wait.
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This is awesome Daniel…
Such creative format…
Clever use of ellipsis
into period to emphasis
the consideration… -
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Will do! Haha
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Betty and
twofiftythree are now friends
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Backdeckbenny (Peter) wrote a new post
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Read MoreEveryday becomes very familiar when a person retires. You get up,have breakfast,make beds,put out washing....you know the drill. But the most familiar things aren't things I do but things I think.Here are just a few. • All suffering is caused by craving.The...
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Peter
My God, your name is so appropriate after reading that piece… sorry, I’m kind of crass at times… but I just wanted to say this sounds more like an every minute thought, not just every day. What happened to that ‘business’ you were attending after coffee?xoxoxo
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That business after coffee remains unresolved 😉
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Great detail. The suspense and direction this poem goes is alluring. Nice work!