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Happy Thomas Crapper Day

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Summary:
...from the vault
he was the first man to say
fuck this shit and mean it
he was literally tired of all the shit
enough of the shit show 
this shit’s gotta go
he no longer wanted to own his own shit
but not just his
he was fed up with putting up with
everybody else’s shit
as far as he was concerned
everybody was full of shit
he knew shit rolled downhill
so he was committed to put an end
to the shit once and for all
and that sentiment inspired him to
invent the world’s first crapper
i salute you,sir as 
i honor you by openly celebrating
Happy Thomas Crapper Day
which is every time i 
flush my toilet
thank you for your help in keeping
so much shit outta my life
you’re a patriot
and a true visionary
 
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