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the fine print of fury

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you wanted to see the monster?
let me introduce you…

I’ve been holdin him back
for too fuckin long
white knucklin these chains
while blisters bloom
but we’re both growin tired of your shit

you’ve no fuckin idea
what lives inside of me
what craves the sensation
of rippin into you
what whispers in my ear
how goddamn beautiful
your destruction would be

one second
that’s all it takes
one moment
where I stop givin a fuck
one slip
where I release everythin
I’ve held back

I will fuckin dismantle you
with every weakness I’ve cataloged
with every fault line I’ve seen
in your self esteem
durin those moment
I smiled nodded and watched
collectin every crack speakin words that you can never unhear
revealin truths that will haunt
your midnight thoughts

you think practiced restraint
is that’s makes me safe?
no…it’s what makes YOU safe
it’s the only fuckin thing
that’s standin between you and bared teeth

I’m not playin your games anymore
I’m not swallowin this rage
to ensure your fuckin comfort
I’m done
so push me again
test me one more time
I dare you to find out what happens
once I’ve decided that
you’re not worth holdin back for

when I finally let go
you’ll understand why everyone
who came before you
still flinches at the sound of my name

keep pushin
keep testin these limits
keep actin like I won’t follow thru

and I’ll show you exactly how it feels
when I decide to turn your soul
into collateral damage
in the war against myself

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    6 COMMENTS

    1. Powerful piece of writing…..I’m not one for anger or rage but I understand the power of both.
      I’ve found that anger is completely internal and should be looked at on that level.Human beings like to blame someone or something for their anger…never themselves.
      Like any powerful emotion, anger left unchecked can ruin lives.

    2. Now this…I know this visceral rage. I’ve been on the receiving end of this and you were right when you’ve said there isn’t poetry in the monster, but this my friend, is poetry. You’ve described the monster perfectly.

      You’re a force…

    3. hello dearest poet I like how you catalog cracks in her self esteem I wonder are you really able to hold the monster back or do you let loose perfectly timed words that cut to the soul…I feel for you that for whatever reason you have to be around someone who makes you feel this way… it is powerful emotions and writing 💕

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